Cheap Beer rankings!!!! The best beer test ever invented!

Ever wander into the beer aisle with $6 in your pocket and wonder which beer is the best cheap beer out there? Neither do I- BUT, if you ever do, this blog entry is for you! Me and 8 of my closet friends did the dirty work for you. We tested 9 beers with 6 pack prices under $6 and survived to tell about it. I'm pretty sure we lost a lot of productivity hours in the library the next day; but hey, it's all in the name of research. So here goes- a complete breakdown of the nine beers we tried along with their average rankings from 1 to 9 and some comments from everyone involved.



As you can see, not exactly a symposium on the finer points of micro-brewing... On to the rankings!!!! We used the same score as the rest of the blog; 0-5 with 5 being highest. Surprisingly, none of these came in at a 5.0.

The first three:



#1 Milwaukee's Best Light: Actually, not too bad. A slight bit of taste for a light beer and much smoother then most of us remembered. The overall ranking came in at 3.21. Here are some of the better commens:

Chris R: Better then expected. Used to hate it.
Kevin P: Crisp start, rusted pipe finish.
John D: Nasty from the smell to the burp.

#2 Natural Light: Again, not so bad. It was rumored this was Busch Light before AB put out the awful crap that is Busch Light. A much finer beer here. I think of the 9 gentlemen in the room, we figured we had consumed at least 4000 cases of this over the last 25 years. Overall ranking was a surprisingly low 2.41.

Cory M: The beer with the taste for food.
Tom W: Smooth and refreshing. A welcome taste in this valley of crap taste test.
Brad O: Just add water and sugar and you get ghetto juice. Not sure if I should take a drink or use it to boil pasta in.

#3 Hamm's Special Light: If this is "special" I'll settle for the regular version anytime. The closest thing to water this side of a public urinal in a truck stop at 11:30 on a Saturday night. Overall ranking was a 2.75. How did this rank higher then Natty Light? Redo!!! Kevin, we'll be back next Friday!

Chris R: Smells like a wet dog- no offense.
Rob P: No real taste.
John D: Tastes like wet cardboard.

BEERS 4-6.



Miller High Life: The champaign of beers. Probably Andre Brut' but "champaign" none-the less. Overall ranking came in at a whopping 3.56! I guess we wanted to live the High Life!

Kevin P: Tastes like salty skin. (That's what he really wrote- I swear)
Tom W: Tastes like the skidmarks from a BMW 7 series.
John Dooley: Certainly the champaign of cheap beer.

Stroh's: Kevin and I thought it would be a good idea to buy 15 of these for about $7at Shop N Save before we started this test. This will go down as one of the worst decisions I made in my whole life. This beer was started in Detroit. I think we now know why Eminem dos not proudly stroll onstage with a can of Stroh's. The overall ranking was a about a 1.1. Seriously.

Chris R: Why did they put dishwashing detergent in it? It was a bad idea to try and chug this stuff.
Cory: Tatses like window cleaner. (Why do all of my friends drink household cleaners?)
Tom W: Simply the worst beer ever created. Period.

Stag: I used to drink this out of the short little brown bottles when I was about 18. I thought it was OK then. Not sure it has stood the test of time. Overall ranking was 2.45. Comments from the peanut gallery:

Kevin P: The Pro Keds of beer.
John D: General taste of ass with a hint of shoe.
Dave L: Bad from the start. Smells like (a teacher in the Wentzville District's) (female area)*

*Comments were slightly modified so I don't get kicked off theis site (and Dave L doesn't get fired- Dave you're welcome).

And the final three:



Icehouse: I never drank this stuff- ever. Now, I know why. Others liked it but not the author of this blog. Sorry, you lose. Overall rating was a 2.95.

Rob P: Good start, bad finish.
Kevin P: Puffed rice start, Malt-O-Meal finish.
Cory M: Smells like a cat's butt, tastes like a cat's butt.

waters...
Hamm's: From the land of sky blue waters... The beer with the coolest jingle in all of history. Add in the Hamm's beer bear and you had some great commercials. If only the beer was as good as the advertising. Overall rating was about a 1.3. Comments for this were so good I'm going to list a few extra.

Rob P: Horrible. Bad taste. (For the record, he almost threw up after he tasted this one).
Kevin P: He started singing the Air Supply song: "All out of Love" for Hamm's. I'm guessing that he didn't care for it.
Tom W: The 2nd worst beer ever created. Whoever said the water was sky blue was colorblind because this water had to be yellow.
Brad O: I'm looking around to see if they are playing a practical joke on me because this really tastes like urine. (For the record, it was just the Hamm's in the can- no help was necessary.)
John D: Smells like a sock after playing indoor soccer.
Cory M: First taste was OK. The second reminded me of an ashtray.

LAST, and not the least was Olympia. The Butler Bulldogs of the taste test! No one expected anything but this impressed everyone. A nice surpise. Overall ranking was a 2.96.

Kevin P: Nutty grain start; orange peel finish. Reminds me of blue moon. (Anything would after the Stroh's).
John D: It in the water all right; the leftover water from the Stroh's factory.
Corey M: A nice golden brown color. Tastes like poop though.
Brad O: Best so far. Must be in the water. (He gave this a 5).

AND THE WINNER IS:
Miller High Life with a 3.56!!!!
#2 Milwaukee's Best Light 3.21
#3 Olympia 3.00
#4 Icehouse 2.95
#5 Hamm's Special Light 2.75
#6 Stag 2.45
#7 Natural Light 2.41
#8 Hamm's 1.30
#9 Stroh's 1.1

There it is. Science never lies! Go live the High Life (if you can't afford real beer). It is good stuff- especially if you only have about $5 for beer! Thanks to Kevin for hosting. Basement looks great. Thanks to everyonewho participated and took time to participate in this "tomfoolery."

Tom W

Happy Mardi Gras!!!!

Happy Mardi Gras to everyone!!! I couldn't go anywhere so I figured I'd get some beer and write a blog. I have five different beers to drink and rate tonight so I better get to it! I'm going to be watching the Duke/ UNC game during so I'll probably comment on that as well. I am a huge Duke fan and there are not many things more enjoyable then Duke beating UNC. I have my JJ Redick jersey on for the occasion.

The first beer tonight is straight from New Orleans. According to the label, it "captures the essence and is characteristic of the gracious charm and joy of living so inherent in the New Orleans and Southern way of life." The classic Dixie Lager which I have never had before.




Brewer: Dixie
Beer Name: Dixie Lager Beer
Beer Style: Lager
Price: $7.99 per six pack at Friar Tucks

Appearance: Very Light in color; somewhat cloudy; almost no head and lacing. Tons of bubbles. It looks like a traditional lager.

Mouthfeel: Somewhat substatial for a lager but still light overall.

Smell: You can smell the hops in the beer and also a slight amount of the malt as well. It has a slightly sweet odor to it. Overall, it smells good.

Tatse: Very smooth, refreshing, and slightly sweet at the end. This beer would be good on a hot, humid southern day. I can see an 18 pack on the beach with no problem. It is a good beer to start with tonight and will be finished very shortly.

Overall Rating: 4.0 A very nice, refreshing lager that would be good on the beach, fishing trip, or the golf course. The next time I head to Gulf Shores, I'm going to grab some of this and head for the ocean.

The second beer is from the same brewer but is their light beer; an amber called "Jazz." Here goes!!

Brewer: Dixie
Beer Name: Dixie Jazz Amber Light
Beer Style: Amber Light Lager
Price: $7.99 per six pack at Friar Tucks



Appearance: Looks similar to the regular lager. Very light in color, slightly cloudy as well.

Mouthfeel: Significantly less substance here. Pretty watered-down which you would expect from a light beer.

Smell: A junior version of the regular lager as well. Slight hint of hops and malt followed by a sweet odor at the end.

Tatse: We have lost quite a bit here. There is not a whole lot to it. This might be a case at the beach at least. You could drink this all day and never get really drunk. It is definitely a light beer and the taste reflects that. This is something my wife might like because of the sweet aftertatse like the regular lager.

Overall Rating: 3.5 for a light beer. Significantly less taste and punch then the regular but that is what light beer is.

The third beer is from Abita Brewing company, the makers of Turbo Dog and Purple Haze.

Brewer: Abita Brewing Co.
Beer Name: Mardi Gras Bock
Beer Style: Bock
Price: $7.99 per 6 pack at Friar Tucks



Appearance: Medium Brown, slightly cloudy. Decent Head and lacing on the glass. Looks like we are having some real beer here.

Mouthfeel: Not too heavy; not too light. A good medium feel.

Smell: Skightly sweet; a nice aroma overall.

Taste: The overriding feature of this beer is the smoothness. For a bock, it is very melloow and smooth with very little aftertaste. Along with the Turbodog, another very nice output from Abita.

Overall rating: 4.0. A solid beer here that is just heavy enough for the cool days of early spring.

And the fourth beer in the list is straight from France. Sure, they make wine too but they also brew beer. After all, not everyone likes wine.

Brewer: Fischer's
Beer Name: Fischer's Blonde
Beer Style: Blond Ale
Price: $3.99 at Friar Tucks for 1 pint, 6 oz. bottle.




Appearance: Light brown; semi-clear, nice head and good lacing.

Mouthfeel: extremely light; even for a blonde

Smell: Sweet, not very beery at all. Very citrusy and light.

Taste: Very good beer here. Smooth, almost silky taste. I could drink gallons of this during the summer. Somewhat unique in that it combines hints of Belgian blondes with a Stella Artois feel to it. Very interesting and I'm having no problem finishing the entire 1 pint, 6 oz. bottle. I am surprised although the one thing the Frenchies have going is their food and drink so I shouldn't be.

Overall rating: 4.5. A very smooth, nice mellow beer with a good taste, afertaste, and aroma as well. This will be bought again.

And the last beer switches back to the brewers from Lousiana: Dixie Blackened Voodoo lager.

Brewer: Dixie
Beer Name Dixie Blackened Voodoo Lager
Beer Style: Lager
Price: $7.99 per six pack at Friar Tucks



Appearance: Dark color; almost brown with a whole red hue to it. Almost no lacing or head when poured.

Aroma: Malt, malt, and more malt. This lager is made on malt alone.

Mouthfeel: rather substantial for a lager. I like it. It's bubbly and slightly heavier then Bud or one of the other standards.

Taste: If you like malty beers, this is the beach beer for you. At 5%. it won't kill you in the sun and it packs some serious taste for a lager. Beats the heck out of any Budweiser or Miller lager for sure. Actually, it's getting better as I finish the glass as well. This is pretty good stuff overall.

Overall rating: I'm giving this a 4.5 for a lager. Not as good as an ale, but for the style, I'm not sure I've had anything better. Good flavor all the way through and at 5%, it'll do the trick.

Listen to this playlist: Nouvelle Vague